The places we pass

When I was biking Monday, I stopped to look at the beautiful yellow-leaved trees in the park beside the Log Cabin Village and Colonial Country Club neighborhood. It was so pretty I just had to walk back yesterday. 

I spent a while just sitting on a bed of fallen leaves and dry grass, leaning back against a sliced down section of a huge tree trunk. The weather was beautiful, as it has been consistently the last few days. I remember someone else commenting on this in a post earlier this semester, but I am truly shocked sometimes how much the weather affects my mood. On days when the light is soft, the sun is warm, and the breeze is gentle, I can't help but stand outside and smile. I'm so content just breathing in the fresh air and feeling the sun on my skin - it's utterly rejuvenating.

I can't believe I've never noticed this little spot before. Not only do I pass it every day on my way to and from work, but it's adjacent to one of the jogging paths I've used on and off over the past three years. I don't know if it's an official park or just a hidden gem, but the stretch of grass, bed of leaves, and plentiful trees are just what I needed today. I wonder how many other places like this ther are that I pass in my daily routine. It's a great reminder to slow down, stop, and explore sometimes. To smell the proverbial roses.

The spot was so comfortable, I spent a while just sitting in contemplation. I looked up at the branches twisting across the sky like slithering snakes. The sun peeks through the leaves that almost look like they've been sponged with paint across a pale blue canvas sky. I watched the leaves spiral lazily towards the ground, already partially carpeted. 

I keep thinking back to Ackerman's "Why Leaves Turn Color in Fall". At first, I appreciated the essay for its beauty and its science, but recently I've been thinking back on its meaning. Especially the words, "Sometimes one finds in fossil stones the imprint of a leaf, long since disintegrated, whose outlines remind us how detailed, vibrant, and alive are the things of this earth that perish." I love how this speaks to the transience of life. Still, it highlights the beauty, the vibrancy of life juxtaposed to death. Because doesn't the fact that living things inevitably perish add meaning to their life? Life and death exist cyclically, in duality. One can't exist without the other, and Ackerman saw the beauty in that. Nature is an endless cycle of living, dying, and being reborn. In nature, death has purpose; it's not an end, but a beginning. When a forest burns, new growth sprouts. Fire can be cleansing, clearing decay and fertilizing soil with nutrients. Some trees can only grow after a fire, which burns away the wax sealing in its seeds, giving possibility for new life. When plants or organisms die, they decay, returning nutrients to the soil in a cycle of carbon. Dust to dust. We need death, not just so that we can appreciate life, but so that life can exist at all. 

Thus, life must be transient. Like so many other good things. So many things seem to be waning right now. The days are growing shorter, the trees are shedding their leaves. Autumn itself is a period of transience, of waning. Like the fall, a period of my life is waning, coming to an end. I've been a student for so long I don't know how to separate it from my identity, but in less than two weeks, I'll officially be a college graduate. It almost seems fitting that 2020 was filled with unprecedented changes, since my life too is in a period of flux now. I've always considered myself self sufficient, but I am in reality a dependent of my parents. But not anymore, in two short weeks I'll be actually on my own for the first time in my life. Surprisingly, I don't feel too afraid of this. I don't know what to feel about it, actually. I think the concept hasn't completely solidified in my mind. 

Thinking these thoughts, I looked around me, noticing the onset of dusk and the shadows lengthening around me. The day too wanes. It's been getting dark so early recently. I thought I had better begin the trek back to my house. 

In the midst of finals stress and all the flux in my life, I'm glad to have spent the day sitting against a tree in contemplation. Nature brings positivity to our lives in so many ways. Increasingly this semester, I've been content to simply exist outdoors, no fancy plans or great adventures. I've found a haven in which to seek refuge from the chaos of the past year whether on a trail, in a tree, on a carpet of grass or in a patch of sun. I've learned that, as much as I love hiking, scenic views, mountain ranges, and exotic locations, I can also find a similar satisfaction by seeking out the more 'normal' nature around me. Always, in any form, it can make me feel, most often contentment, joy, or peace.

Are there any places you pass that could be waiting to be explored?